Learning english (humor)

‘Did ya know’ asked Tham, ‘happy means lots of sex?’ Jenny drew in a deep breath and silently counted to ten. Only then could she respond to this enthusiastic refugee in the serious manner befitting of a teacher of English. Sometimes the weight of responsibility overwhelmed her as she tried to guide their paths intoContinue reading “Learning english (humor)”

I have a little secret (Humor)

I have a little secret And don’t know what to do If I share my problem Can I place my trust in you?   I used to take my secret beside me everywhere It was jolly useful And no-one thought to care   Initially I believed A use could still be found my sad littleContinue reading “I have a little secret (Humor)”

Who saved who?

In twelve years they hadn’t met, but in this new thing called lock-down, Grace saw her neighbour every day, when they both happened near a window simultaneously. With this stranger caged at a safe distance, Grace shyly returned her neighbours friendly-looking waves. This simple connection prised open her black dog prison bars, temporarily quelling suicidalContinue reading “Who saved who?”

T-Shirts (humor)

There were moments that no amount of training or experience could prepare you for, and this was one of them. The mourners were looking at her expectantly, waiting for comforting words to help them through their grief, but it was simply impossible; she was in no state to help these people. Words blurred on theContinue reading “T-Shirts (humor)”

Home-coming (humor)

He was asleep; she was sure of it. Creeping slowly along the hallway, she carefully avoided the creaky floorboard, third from the toilet door. Her fingers slid silently along the darkened wall, feeling for the landmarks that let her know where she was. Just in time she remembered the broom; knocking it over would surelyContinue reading “Home-coming (humor)”

‘Found’ story (humor)

This short story is the result of a writers group challenge. Each line is the title of a book to be found in my home, hence the genre is known as a ‘found’ piece. The authors names are in brackets. Enjoy! How to kill your husband                                          (Kathy Lette) Its perfectly easy                                                        (Mary Scott) Don’t tell a soul                                                        Continue reading “‘Found’ story (humor)”

Unbuttoning surprises (humor)

Scanning her mother’s kitchen, Phin tried to act normally. ‘I guess that’s it for now. Did we miss anything?’ Her sister, Vic, listed the jobs off. ‘Fridge, rubbish, laundry, glasshouse water timer, stopped paper, diverted mail, and made sure the neighbor is happy about the cat. Oh, and packed mum a bag. I put thatContinue reading “Unbuttoning surprises (humor)”

Trust Uncle Henry (references abuse)

God its cold! Even with my new shawl wrapped tightly, the wind cuts right through. All the mourners look like they’re cold too. Poor Mum is clinging to Dad. She spent ages this morning trying to decide which gloves to wear, like it makes a difference. Dad’s numbly stoical, fortified by his best dark suit.Continue reading “Trust Uncle Henry (references abuse)”

A whale of a time (Creative non-fiction – humor)

(February 2020) Trapped in a bubble, suspended 1400 feet above the sea, along with four strangers half my age; help! What on earth am I doing here, and how, exactly, is this going to end? Yesterday I was sedately heading home, having survived the very real danger of being beaten (again) at cards by theContinue reading “A whale of a time (Creative non-fiction – humor)”

Mashed potato (humour)

‘There they go again; bicker, bicker, bicker.’ Jamie hated teatime. ‘Why can’t grown-ups behave like it?’ She pushed her peas around with her fork, shrinking low in the forlorn hope of being ignored. ‘It’s not like they’re arguing about anything important. Who cares if the bed-sheets should have been changed today anyway?’ A pea rolledContinue reading “Mashed potato (humour)”