Call me Pav (Humour)

(First published NZ Flash Fiction anthology 2020) My name? Pavlova. Stupid eh? Mum said it’s cos I was made from beaten eggs and toxic sugar, hidden under peaches and cream. Grandma says it’s cos Mum dreamt of pavlova while she was under the knife having me. Mums other kids have boring names, like Tom, Dick andContinue reading “Call me Pav (Humour)”

Recognition (references dementia)

My granddaughter, Aylufa, came to live with me last year. I pretended I needed care, but honestly, her free board is just this grandma’s way of helping a beloved mokopuna save for her dreams. That’s why I’m so disappointed, and, let’s be honest, bloody angry. Discovering my hard-earned cash hidden in her bedroom is the final blow. I knew she’d been systematically stealing myContinue reading “Recognition (references dementia)”

Editing (Humour)

‘There’s so much to do’ she complained to her husband. ‘I’ll never get this book finished.’ Annoyingly pragmatic, he countered ‘Maybe you should edit your life as thoroughly as you edit your work; cut out the rubbish.’ ‘Oh’ he added ‘I’m off to help your sister after I’ve eaten.’ ‘Again?’ She pondered his words whilstContinue reading “Editing (Humour)”

Ten cents

My foot disturbed something in the grass. Bending over, I instructed my fingers to find it; bring it into my field of sight. they took their time, fumbling around and refusing to work together. Feeling it’s shape, I knew what it was even before they finally showed it; a ten cent piece. Once treasure, nowContinue reading “Ten cents”

The waiting room (Humor)

Dentist’s waiting rooms grind my nerves. No matter how sparkling the receptionist, how beaming the flowers, how enlightening the magazines, I wait with taut stomach, clenched jaw, and sweaty brow. Behind double doors, a drill bores it’s victim’s tooth. I feel the pain, hear the silent screams, and sympathize with the patients rapidly rinsing wallet.Continue reading “The waiting room (Humor)”

Intelligent conversation (Humour)

Today, at last, I found intelligent conversation; what a breath of fresh air it is! Lately I’ve felt like everyone around me were idiots… and the arguments; just ridiculous. No matter what the topic, their comments were predictable, banal, boring. I was beginning to think it was all a waste of time. Then, today, out ofContinue reading “Intelligent conversation (Humour)”

Digging holes (humour)

Granddad’s a ‘get-it-done’ man. When there’s junk around, he uses his big digger to bury whatever’s bugging him. He does those jobs early; starts the day right, he reckons. Grandma’s different. If something’s bugging her, she nags Granddad. When her nagging is bad, Granddad threatens to put her in a hole. Grandma scoffs back, ‘thenContinue reading “Digging holes (humour)”

Missed connection

There were no messages today. Fran hadn’t expected any of course. Why would anyone bother, when she had nothing to contribute? Maybe someone would remember tomorrow; remember her and send a message, even if by mistake would be fine. Just anything, so that she could know she actually lives, is real, is here. Who needs them anyway,Continue reading “Missed connection”

The box (humor)

Everything was crackling, renewing after the bleakness of winter. Spring’s  promise can be quite invigorating, in unexpected ways. We were old back then. Who knew we would still be here twenty years later. It’s a good thing that we broke the rules. Twenty years… such a long time. When we became grandparents, about the sameContinue reading “The box (humor)”